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melting but not down

Thursday, 6 August 2009

getting to grips with this memory loss lark

I was going round anyway but mum phoned Wednesday morning, agitated because she'd lost her keys again and thought she'd have to have more cut. When I arrived, it didn't take too long to find the 'lost' keys (and her purse that had gone walkabout). Mum has a habit of moving things around then forgetting where she's put them. I'm trying to get her to use the same hiding places but as much as she agrees its a good idea, I don't hold out much hope that she'll remember to do it. I think I'll have to buy some key tags to attach to each key, clearly stating which lock each one fits. Different coloured caps don't work - she forgets what they mean. Despite the kerfuffle, mum was in quite a good mood. Neither of us mentioned the thorny accommodation issue, sleeping dogs and all that. I did some shopping for her to tide her over until Saturday and told her I'd see her again on Friday so I'm expecting a phone call on Thursday, requesting my presence.

I wish the Blogger interest link were working, I'd like to find others dealing with parents with memory loss. There must be some useful strategies for carers out there somewhere.


Granny on the Web said...

Sadly, this memory loss will only get worse. I used to note in my days of caring for the elderly, that up to a certain plateau they were as your mother is, once over that plateau they settled into being compliant and oblivious of how they were. This uphill climb is a battle to keep control of her world, but unfortunately as you are finding out, those nearest get all the flak. She probably is terrified of losing her grip on her world.
My own mother went this way, but she had quite a sudden plateau, and then she got as she didn't know us either. Although it sounds heartbreaking to think your own mother doesn't know you, it is also a relief that their mind is no longer struggling in fear and panic.
It is indeed a cruel disease, the research into it is ongoing, but money is tight for all research. One day though, there will be a way of halting it.
Thinking of you Lily.

Love Granny

Lily said...

Such wisdom in your words, granny. Sometimes I find myself wishing for mum's dementia to speed up to the point that only a care home will do, at least then she would have the 24/7 attention that she needs.

Emily said...

There must be support groups out there...I found a couple of linksd that may (or may not) be useful. You need the company, at least.


Aging Parents - Elder Care - Senior care (I can't seem to find what this one is actually called)

Lily said...

thanks Em x