meh

Is it really only 11 weeks since mum died?  Feels like 11 months. I'd say I'm all over it now but maybe not.  I suspect that the stress of the months leading up to mum's death has finally caught up with me.  I am feeling quite low but I'm attributing that to lack of sleep - for weeks and weeks the old nettle devils problem has been waking me up constantly, gradually zombie-fying me.   I've tried a variety of anti-histamines and moisturisers (made me itch more) but it wasn't until I slathered myself in steroid ointment and took a double dose of doze-inducing anti-histamines two days ago that relief finally came. I'm hoping things will improve from now because I'm really struggling at work, not only lacking the energy to get through the day but also having lost all enthusiasm for the job.  I'd retire today if I could afford it.