here's a question for you......

In one of her more hilarious utterances yesterday, my mum said of her neighbour - "she's noted for her dirty drains!"

What would you be noted for?

Not a bad day

Took mum to see her doctor who examined her thoroughly (all ok physically apart from wobbly legs) and gave her an extended memory test. Lovely doc that she is, she didn't let mum know that she had not done too well - she guessed today's date as 17th, the month as June and didn't know the year or Prime Minister. She was also a few years out on the date the first world war started but she did know her own address and her doctor's name. As suggested, I asked mum whether she would like to try the memory clinic but she curled her lip on that one. I'm going to phone the hospital up next week to make an appointment with the hearing clinic to try to get mum a better hearing aid (I know, I meant to do it last year). The doctor thinks mum's unsteadiness is more likely to be an inner ear problem than a result of the stroke. Can deafness make you wobbly? If your hearing improves (with the aid of technology) does your balance improve too? Managed with the doc's help to move the appointment with the nurse from the afternoon to this morning so she could have her blood tests and B12 injection straight after seeing the doctor AND I had to take a phial of mum's pee back to the surgery this afternoon. Honestly, the things I do for that woman.

Anyhoo, I finally found a cardigan pattern I think mum might like and I have ordered some yarn for it from ebay. If she doesn't like it I'll pull the blooming lot out and knit something for myself!

life and death in deepest darkest Yorkshire

I could moan about mum but I won't. Much. Sufficeth to say that having had lunch, wandered round Guisborough market and home for tea and cake with her today, I am now in the bad books for forgetting to put the bin out ready for the bin men tomorrow. I'm sure she rang in the hope that I'd go back tonight to take out the cans she'd put in the bin and put them in the recycling box. Grr.

Never mind. There are others worse off. The racing pigeon in our front garden for example. Well, what's left of it, ie minus head and a chunk of chest. At first sight this morning you'd think some very large pieces of ash had floated into two piles - one under the trees near the end of the drive and one by the fence at the side of the lawn. On closer inspection the remains of the stray (ha ha) were by the fence and most of its chest and back feathers in the other pile. Poor little mite was sporting a ring so I gingerly took hold of its chilly little pink leg and turned the ring so I could note down the ID details. I've just e-mailed the relevant organisation to let the owner know. Must wash my hands.....

told you so

Apparently my heart valves are working well, no sign of dad's genetic heart defect. The consultant said there was some damage to my heart from having had high blood pressure but as that is now well controlled by medication, there's nothing more to be done. Back to square one. I suppose it must just be life that's wearing me out. Pfft.

a quick ramble through the past week

True to her word, the doctor has written to mum to invite her in for a chat as she hasn't seen her for a long time and while there, have her B12 injection and some blood tests. Mum hasn't rumbled my dastardly plot - we go to the surgery on Friday.

I have my appointment with the consultant this afternoon for the results of my transthoracic echocardiogram. I just know he's going to say the tests were fine, dammit. Meanwhile, I'm still in my pyjamas at 10:50, trying to motivate myself to clean the bathroom and hoover up.

Husband got his results from his oximeter tests yesterday, he definitely suffers from sleep apnoea and has been told to stop smoking and lose weight. He has also had to shave off his moustache so the CPAP mask will fit with a good seal. (That's not himself in the photo, by the way.) He tried it last night, not a huge success - had to keep taking it off to blow his nose and kept making farting noises when he breathed through his mouth. He abandoned it in the end. Pity, the machine made soothing wheezy-breeze noises and the farting was funny. Still, can't be entertained all night, those days are long gone, lol.

Anything else? Ah yes - reminders of old age creeping on - my son turned thirty a few weeks ago and two of my friends are 60 this year. Bastards, don't they know I'm still 27?

Ok, I'm going to stop procrastinating RIGHT NOW.

the mum chronicles

Things have taken an odd turn. I'd got used to the deteriorating short term memory that's resulted in a few 'lost x - someone's stolen x - found x where I put it' moments recently (the latest was a £10 bag of loose change that turned up in my purse, where she'd emptied it, thinking it was her purse). That sort of thing I can cope with and we can laugh about it later.

Wednesday this week saw a new and worrying version. Our telephone rang at 10pm. I didn't get to it before the answerphone clicked in but after the message I said 'hello' a few times. All I could hear was heavy breathing. I dialled 1471 and sure enough, it was mum's number. I rang straight back twice, letting the phone ring for a quite a while. Nothing. Fearing another stroke, I drove over to mum's, arriving about 10.30. She was tucked up in bed and surprised to see me - "I've just been thinking about you" she said! Long story short, she then went into a rant about my arranging an appointment for her to go for her vitamin B12 injection next week. (She has pernicious anaemia and has been having a jab every 3 months for years.) She said she felt like she had no control over her own life and why should I be making appointments for her, it should be the doctor, she wanted it cancelling and didn't seem to remember she had been having the treatment for ages. (She also said she hadn't spoken on the phone because "he answered" - the answerphone message was recorded by my husband!)

I phoned her doctor on Thursday for advice. She was very understanding. She reassured me that missing one B12 wouldn't matter and ok'd cancelling the appointment. She promised to send mum a letter inviting her in for a review of her medication and said she wouldn't mention that I had phoned her - I don't want to add to mum's paranoia by 'going behind her back'! Phew. Interesting times ahead?

current knitting projects

The prototype:

Not the best of photos but you get the idea. I'm rather proud of my first attempt at knitting after a quarter of a century and I did receive lots of compliments when I wore it to work this week but....I made a few significant mistakes so won't be wearing it again (I'm now knitting 'raspberry waistcoat - the sequel). Things I have learned:

1. Don't underestimate the size of your bosom - the sequel is a size larger.


2. Don't cast on/off too tightly in rib, I've now learned a great 2-fingered method (steady now) which gives a neat and stretchy edge.


3. NEVER press acrylic yarn, no matter how low the iron temperature and the use of a proper ironing sheet between iron and fabric. The sequel's patterns will not be flattened.


4. Leave plenty of yarn at joins, it will be easier to weave invisibly into the finished seams.


5. NEVER knit when you're tired.

I also have 'on the needle' a cardigan for my husband which I'm knitting on needles half a size larger to scale up the pattern for his humungous chest. Hopefully, it will look like this:

the back so far--->

oh dear

I am obsessed by knitting. Its all I want to do. I take it with me to work for the lunch hour, to the pub on a Friday night and to my mother's every time I go. I even get up early on a Sunday morning when everyone else is asleep so I can knit in peace and surf the net for patterns. I have only to sew up the side seams of the waistcoat and add the buttons and its done but I'm already anxious about the possibility of having nothing else to knit after it. I have ordered the wool for the next project from ebay - a (very large) cardigan for him indoors and am looking for patterns for a hoodie for my son and a cardigan for my mum (although she probably wouldn't wear it). I now see why seasoned knitters talk of having several projects 'on the needle' at once - its an addiction! Here's a short film about me......

Urrrgh

I've been feeling a bit down lately. I think the cardiogram on Monday set it off. I've no idea what any of it meant - the technician didn't explain any of the screens, just told me when to change position or take a deep breath. Every now and then she took a snapshot of bits of my heart, usually when there were a few different colours pulsing. I won't find out the results until I see the consultant on 24 March. I'm resigning myself to hearing 'everything's perfectly normal' and a lifetime of knackeredness.

I have to drive to Runcorn for a meeting today and the fuse has blown in my car's cigarette lighter so it won't power up the Sat Nav. I'm charging it up on the computer and will try to get another fuse before I set off but I've written directions as back up. It's a 266 mile round trip. If I don't post again, I fell asleep at the wheel.

I nearly did but I made it home in one piece :-)